I puked a lego.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Still dying that you shit outside
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
