eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Randomize
