scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
