i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
