Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
