I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
