What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
