What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Who died my cat blue again?
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
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