billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
