Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
Randomize
