I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
