Pregnant stripper...not hot.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
