Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
