its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
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