Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
No subtext here. People are naked.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
