Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
another moral hangover. fuck.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Randomize
