How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize