OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I could fuck to npr.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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