I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
