very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
There r osticjed everywhere
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
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