you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
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