What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Randomize
