Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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