Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize