ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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