operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
