No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
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