Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize
