The panties match.
I'll be right there.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
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