So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
is this the sara with the beer cane?
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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