i just google imaged poop.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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