i don't like sucking hair
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Randomize
