Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
My feet surprised me
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
