I'm laying in your front yard are you home
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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