I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize