Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
