This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize
