I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
