The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Randomize
