You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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