I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
