There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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