you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I didn't notice because vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
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