please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
