the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
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