I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
