Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Randomize
