I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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