do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Randomize
