That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
It's never too late to be topless.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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